In this reflective and free-flowing fifth episode of Qrious Threads, Clive and Dom explore a question that quietly sits at the centre of so many life decisions: Who were you before the world told you who to be? It’s a conversation about unlearning, listening inward, and rediscovering the self beneath all the roles, routines, and expectations we’ve taken on.
This episode weaves together ideas from philosophy, personal experience, and simple daily practices. Clive and Dom don’t try to offer answers — instead, they stay with the question and explore what it stirs.
Unlearning the Identities We’ve Been Handed
Clive begins by reflecting on how years of being shaped by work, social roles, and the need for security have influenced his sense of self. Dom shares his own story of choosing not to become “one thing,” and how avoiding being pinned down has opened up space for a different kind of freedom.
Together, they explore the idea that our sense of self is often inherited — from family, culture, or education — and that real growth sometimes begins with questioning the roles we’ve accepted without realising.
Listening to the Signals Life Sends You
They talk about stress as a signpost, not a failure. When we feel discomfort or confusion, it can be the universe nudging us toward something more aligned. That may be as simple as slowing down, journaling, or recognising what we’ve been avoiding. Often, it’s not the to-do list that matters most — it’s the thing underneath it that’s asking for our attention.
Dom draws a parallel between our personal growth and the butterfly’s transformation: the moment where the caterpillar has no idea what comes next, but still enters the cocoon. That act of trust and surrender, he suggests, is where real change begins.
Clearing Space to Hear Yourself Think
Clive brings in the concept of “mental feng shui” — clearing out the small things that clutter our headspace, like undone tasks or unresolved decisions. He reflects on how even something simple like making your bed can provide structure and reduce inner noise. Dom shares how simplifying your environment can help you hear the natural guidance that’s already trying to reach you.
They agree that stillness, in whatever form it takes, can create a more receptive space for self-awareness to emerge.
Rethinking Communication and Connection
One of the more playful threads in the episode is the idea that language might not be the only — or even the best — tool for connection. Dom wonders what might happen if we just stopped speaking for a while. Would we find another way to communicate? Could we even start to understand the deeper presence of things around us?
This segues into a light-hearted but intriguing exploration of wave structure theory and the idea that everything in the universe — including us — may be more connected than we realise.
Takeaways to Reflect On
Question the roles and identities you’ve inherited. Ask whether they still reflect who you really are
Create space — mentally and physically — to notice what’s asking for your attention
Learn to listen for the subtle signals that show up in stress, discomfort or discontent
Allow yourself to slow down. Stillness isn’t laziness — it’s a gateway to clarity
Stay open to new ways of knowing and connecting beyond words
Final Thought
This episode doesn’t try to define who you are. It simply invites you to pause and ask the question: Who were you before the world told you who to be? And perhaps more importantly — who might you still become?
All episodes of Qrious Threads are available on your favourite podcast platform, or right here at qriousthreads.com/podcast.
Let the thread lead somewhere unexpected.
